Day 71: The Mother of All Workouts

You can't judge a book by its cover but you can judge a workout by your sweat-soaked shirt. As you can see in the photo, the P90X plyometrics workout is truly a soaker. My girlfriend, Karen, tried the workout with me today for the first time and loved it, even though it kicked her butt. Tony Horton, the creator of P90X, refers to plyometrics as the mother of all X workouts. In my opinion, that's an understatement.

Wikipedia defines plyometrics as a type of exercise training designed to produce fast, powerful movements, and improve the functions of the nervous system, generally for the purpose of improving performance in sports. Plyometric movements, in which a muscle is loaded and then contracted in rapid sequence, use the strength, elasticity and innervation of muscle and surrounding tissues to jump higher, run faster, throw farther, or hit harder, depending on the desired training goal. Sounds exactly like what I'm looking for.

Unfortunately, plyometrics is very difficult and probably the hardest of the P90X workouts. Something about exercising those fast twitch muscles creates an extra burn in your legs. Even the people on the DVD are huffing and puffing and moaning. However, despite the pain, plyometrics is still one of the four P90X workouts that I will include in future weekly workouts.

The four workouts that I plan on doing weekly are: X Stretch, Yoga X, Kenpo X and Plyometrics. None of these workouts develop the glamor muscles, but they do improve performance. I like big muscles like everyone else, but at this stage of my life, I care more about function than I do form. That doesn't mean I won't include some type of upper and lower body strength training in my weekly workouts but the focus will be on maintaining muscle rather than growing muscle.

In today's photo I am doing the Airborne Heisman. During this exercise, I jump from side to side bringing my opposite knee up as high as I can and holding it briefly. This exercise gives you a strong cardio workout and works everything from your glutes to your calves. When doing a plyometrics workout, make sure you wear shoes and use some type of padded mat to absorb the shock. Plyometrics is a high impact workout and you can easily injure yourself if your not careful. When I did my first plyo workout 70 days ago, my knees and hips were killing me for a couple of weeks.

Day 70: Get Into the Groove Boy

Boy, does that feel so good. I finished up my 10th week of P90X with a Sunday morning X Stretch workout. As Tony Horton, the creator of P90X, says at the beginning of the workout, X Stretch is all about taking care of yourself.

I woke up early this morning and did my workout at Karen's while she left to attend her daughter's horseback riding lesson. People that know me can tell by the photo I'm not at home because Karen actually hangs artwork on her walls. My place, although nice, has often been described with such adjectives like barren, sterile, bacheloresque, spartan or boring.

The workout was wonderful. Although, I'm still exercising technically, it's nice to take a day off from the jumping, lunging, lifting, pulling and punching.The stretching is such a great way to start the day.

As my flexibility improves, I am noticing less back pain. I spent the weekend doing some heavy duty yard work around Karen's. In the old days, I would have been extremely sore and stiff afterward. Now, I only feel slightly tired. My flexibility workouts are definitely improving my quality of life more than anything else I do. After 70 hard days of exercise, it's nice to finally start yielding some results.

You could say, I'm finally getting into the groove.

Day 69: The Great White Hope[ful]

Look at me
I'm the great white hope[ful]
Can't you see
I'm up against the ropes
Don't you know
It's so hard to cope
When you feel
Like the great white hope[ful]
 - Styx

I love the Kenpo X and feel like I'm doing great, but I have to admit, when I look at this video, two words come to mind: Sloooow Mooootion. My God! I'm not trying to be overly self-critical, but I look like I'm at an underwater tai chi class. Granted, I do have some force and if I caught an opponent with a fist, foot or knee, I'd definitely hurt them. But that assumes that I would actually be able to catch them. Thank God, I just do this for exercise. Thank God, I'm an accountant and not a bouncer.

Karen joined me for the workout today and really enjoyed herself. She's becoming more and more of a P90X fan and works out with me at least once to twice a week now. It's always more enjoyable to workout with someone else. I especially enjoy working out with my girlfriend and sharing our healthy past time together. Karen and I started dating last Spring after we met at an exercise boot camp.

Karen's and my next goal is to convert the third bay of her garage into a home gym. Currently, when we want to do anything other than an X Stretch or a Yoga X workout, we have to go to my house. This is inconvenient on the weekends I stay at Karen's house. Therefore, I'm compiling a To Buy list and will start working on this project soon.

In the meantime, I think I'm going to try to try to speed things up a little bit. At my size I'll never be a fast-forward kind of guy, but I definitely don't want to be Mr. Slow Motion either. Don't worry. I guarantee you that I'll keep at it. I may look a little hopeless in the video, but on the inside, I'll always be The Great White Hopeful.

Day 68: Pain & Suffering

The P90X Leg and Back workout was miserable this morning. If the 80+ pull ups weren't difficult enough, this workout has some killer leg exercises. Your leg muscles are the largest muscles in your body which means means you will experience pain and suffering on a larger scale.

Most people ignore legs when they workout. This is a big mistake. We've all seen the big muscular guy who never works his legs and ends up looking like a light bulb. Your legs are half of your body and therefore require at least half of your strength training. P90X hits your legs three times each week. The plyometrics would be considered a leg workout and the Yoga X has a lot of poses that work the legs. That's one of the things that I love about P90X; the workouts are so well balanced between strength, cardio, flexibility, upper body and lower body. No areas get ignored or neglected.

In the photo I am doing wall squats. Although, this exercise looks fairly easy, don't let appearances deceive you. Wall squats are 60 seconds of pure quad  and glute torture and they make you do it twice. However, this is the price you have to pay, if you want to have lean muscular legs and a nice firm booty.

Karen joined me for the workout today. She thought the workout was pretty intense and enjoyed it. However, like me, she was surprised on how quickly she recovered after the workout and questioned whether she pushed herself hard enough. Karen did push herself hard but when you're in good shape, you recover quickly. That's a good thing.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I think I'm going to go squeeze Karen's nice firm booty.

Day 67: Namaste

How appropriate that my Yoga X workout would fall on Thanksgiving. In the photo I am doing the Namaste pose. The word, Namaste, is a common greeting in Southeast Asia that means, "I bow to you." Namaste also has many other cool multi-religious meanings that go along with the spirit of Thanksgiving. Click here if you're interested in reading more.

I am very thankful this Thanksgiving. If you look at all the crazy things that have happened to me this year (e.g. open-heart surgery, totaled my car twice, etc.), you'd probably think I was one of the unluckiest people you ever met. However, I consider myself very fortunate.

First, I survived my heart surgery. Most people die before they discover they had my problem. I walked away from two major auto accidents with nary a scratch. Business has been slow but at least I'm still in business. I have three wonderful sons and we all have a great relationship. I met my soul mate, Karen, this year. I've dated lots of girls, but this is my first serious relationship since my divorce 15 years ago. I'm in better shape than I was in high school thanks to the P90X program and my remodeled heart. The list goes on and on.

It is so easy to look at life negatively, to see the down side of things. However, you can just as easily flip things over and see how bad luck is quite often good luck, tragedy is triumph. Even though times are hard, I think we all have a lot to be thankful for. Life is truly golden.

Namaste

Day 66: Now We're Talking

Today was my first P90X workout using my new pull up bar. Now we're talking. P90X just got a whole lot more intense. As I sit here writing this post, I can feel the difference. My muscles are singing like a choir full of little boys. Can you hear 'em?

You'll notice the top of a folding chair under my foot in the photo. I can't do a single unassisted pull up, so I have to use a chair to provide some support. Believe me, these pull ups are still tough as hell. I did eight sets of pull ups totaling almost 70 reps. That's about half the number of reps I would have done if I were using the bands but I feel twice as sore and tired. This pull up bar is really going to kick up the intensity during these last four weeks of P90X. Yeah, baby!!!!

I also increased the intensity of the other exercises during today's workout. I bumped all of my weights up five pounds. If I did static bicep curls using 20 pounders last week, I did it with 25 pounders today. I can feel the extra burn. Thank God I brushed my teeth before working out because I don't think I could lift my toothbrush to my mouth if I had to brush them now.

As you can tell, I am very, very excited about taking my P90X workouts up to a higher level. Perhaps now I'll start seeing the results I've been fighting for.

Day 65: Just Breathe

I don't know if it was the warm weather or the lack of sleep but today's plyometrics workout was an ass kicker. I was huffing and puffing and gasping for air. It took everything I had to just breathe.

Sometimes when I exercise the wind is at my back and sometimes it's against me. You can probably tell by the photo which way the wind was blowing today. However, I hung in there and pressed on and finished the workout. This is what the X in P90X is all about. X means extreme. If P90X were easy, everybody would be doing it.

As I've stated before, plyometrics is in my opinion the most difficult of the P90X workouts. Plyometrics is also one of the most beneficial workouts. This is the workout that's going to condition me to run and jump. This is the workout that's going to help me backhand a tennis ball or rebound a basketball. This is the workout that's going to make me young again.

When I'm finished with this round of P90X and I develop my own workout regimen, I will include at least one plyometrics workout into my weekly schedule. This type of exercise is vital if you have an active lifestyle. Plyo will kick your butt and make you gasp for air, but the best things in life don't come cheap.

Day 64: Plateauing?

Today marks the 10th week of my P90X journey. I only have four weeks remaining and I don't expect major changes. In fact, I feel as if I have plateaued. Quite often when people exercise, their bodies adapt to the workouts and their muscles stop growing. P90X purports to avoid this by cycling through different workouts and creating muscle confusion. The muscle confusion prevents your body from adapting and keeps your muscles growing. When I look in the mirror, my muscles don't look very confused though. However, in the photo my head does appear to still be growing. Eat your heart out, Shrek.

This week I'm going to try to get a body fat percentage test, take some photos to compare to my Before photos and do the same with my body measurements. This will let me know if I'm actually plateauing or if it's just in my head. Facts don't lie.

I'm finally close to weening myself off of the Prednisone. I have less than two weeks before I'm done. I'm hoping that I'll drop a lot of water weight once I'm completely off the medicine. My appetite should also decrease so I'm hoping it will be easier to reduce my calories from 3,500 per day to just under 3,000. I'm always hungry on this Prednisone. This is the first time I've dieted and exercised and not lost significant weight and it's frustrating. I'm still hovering around 255 pounds and I was hoping to be down to 240 by now. Maybe I'm just getting old and my metabolism is slowing down.

Well, regardless of whether or not I'm plateauing, I do know that I'm going to keep working out hard. I may not be all ripped and cut up like I was hoping but I sure do feel amazing. I guess that's the most important thing in the end.

Day 63: The Pull Up Bar Hath Arrived

Today concluded nine weeks of P90X. I had a great Stretching X workout. I'm getting more and more limber. Blah, blah, blah. Here's the real news, folks. My pull up bar has been installed and is ready for action! No longer do I have to throw an exercise band over one of the fire sprinkler pipes and do simulated pull ups. Now I can do the real thing!

I ordered an excellent pull up bar from http://studbarpullup.com for only $140. The bar is 4' wide and made of heavy duty steel. My son, Ryan, mounted it to my cement ceiling in the garage and this bar ain't going nowhere. It will support over 2,000 pounds. When the pull up bar arrived in the mail a few weeks ago, I realized I had ordered the wrong size. I ordered a bar for a 10' ceiling and my ceilings are 9.5'. Fortunately, a good friend and client of mine, Gerald Huff of J&J Fire Protection, modified the bar and provided me with all of the hardware to mount it to my ceiling. Thanks, Gerald.

I do have one problem, however. Before my triple bypass in April of this year, I could do three pull ups. Tonight when I tried, I couldn't do a single pull up. If you look at the photo, that was as high as I could pull myself up. To do a full pull up, I had to put one leg on a chair for additional support. That's how they advise you to do in the P90X videos, but I was still disappointed as I watched Ryan effortlessly crank out 15 pull ups.

The good news is that my workouts will be changing. These pull ups, even when using the modified chair approach, are still much harder than using bands. I believe I will get better results and hopefully someday be able to one pull up unaided. Maybe in a couple of years, I'll even be able to do two pull ups.

Day 62: Me versus Me

Kenpo X is still my favorite P90X workout. It's 60 minutes of Me versus Me. I'm not a a competive person when it comes to other people. I don't care if I can beat you and I don't care if you can beat me. I've never been wired that way.

The only person I compete against is myself. Am I pushing myself as hard as I can? Am I giving 100%? Is my performance improving? Am I eating healthy? Am I not smoking? Am I getting enough sleep?

My old self, Jeff 1.0, doesn't like P90X. He wants to make excuses to skip workouts. He wants to coast and give less than 100%. He wants to eat crappy food. He wants to smoke a Marlboro Light. He wants to stay up late. He wants to keep Jeff 2.0 from coming to be.

You get the picture? When I do my Kenpo X, I'm kicking and punching Jeff 1.0. It's Me versus Me. It's Jeff 1.0 versus Jeff 2.0. Every day, every workout, I'm fighting the Jeff 1.0 that wants to park my ass on the sofa and stuff me with nachos while I watch hours of non-calorie-burning television and chain-smoke cigarettes.

I can't let Jeff 1.0 win. He's the son-of-a-bitch who fattened me up to 305 pounds, destroyed my health and nearly killed me with a triple bypass at the young age of 47. How dare he.

It's Me versus Me and I am going to kick Jeff 1.0's ass.

Day 61: P90X Followed by P90XXX

I once asked a former girlfriend what she wanted for Christmas. She gave me a coy look and said, "get me something that makes me look sexy." Boy was she pissed when I bought her an exercise bike.

I don't have to worry about that anymore. My girlfriend, Karen, loves to exercise as much as I do and she already looks sexy. Whenever Karen's not working out with one of her trainers or taking an exercise bootcamp, she's doing a P90X workout with me in my garage. Karen's incredibly athletic and can do more reps with better form on most of the exercises. Thank God, I'm still able to lift more than her.

Today, I want to tell you about one of the best side-effects of exercise. Your sex life gets a whole lot better! As your cardiovascular health improves, you can be much more enthusiastic in your endeavors and have the endurance to go a long time and hold unusual positions. Of course, you want to have the muscular strength required for those unusual positions. As you increase your flexibility you will also open up a wonderland of possibilities. Finally, exercise is scientifically proven to reduce the two biggest libido-killers, stress and fatigue.

When I was fat, out of shape, and smoking a pack a day, sex was the last...er...maybe not the last, but it wasn't the first thing on my mind...like it is now. Since I've gotten myself back into shape, I feel like an lion. Hear me roar. Part of this is probably a result of the better self-image you have when you are fit; you look in the mirror and like what you see. Your partner's also going to like what they see and probably let you know it.

In the photo, Karen is doing the Mason Twist during the 15 minute P90X Ab Ripper X workout that follows the hour-long P90X Leg and Back workout. I'm feeling so good and Karen's looking so good that I'm going to see if she wants to do a special P90XXX workout when were finished. Can you blame me?

Editor's Note: To any prudes who are offended by this post, go buy yourself an exercise bike.

Day 60: Tranqulity

Yoga was very tranquil today. Every time I looked to my left, I saw the new pegboard that took me until midnight to install last night. Now I have a place to hang all my bands, clipboards, small tools, etc. Although I vacillate between chaos and order, between Felix and Oscar, I have an anal-retentive OCD spirit trapped inside me desperately trying to get out. Last night he got out.

I wish I was organized. Everyone thinks I'm organized but I am not. Well, I am but I am not. Let's just say that I am the most organized slob you'll ever meet. Parts of my life are in perfect order. Parts of my life are shear chaos. I am a walking contradiction. Lately, I've had the organization bug and have been putting things in order. I've installed new shelving in the garage and put everything in its place. I just purchased a huge set of bookshelves and finally found a home for all of our books. My walk-in closet is immaculate. My car trunk is empty. I love it. I just have to finish my living room, kitchen and the boys' room and I'll have my home in perfect order.

This is pretty much what I've been trying to do with my health through the P90X system. I've been trying to take charge and organize my healthy habits. Maybe the P90X is spreading to other areas of my life? Hmmm? Regardless, I'm feeling better. I have more energy and my candle is burning much, much brighter. I really think I could learn to live with this tranquility stuff.

Day 59: Midnight Muscle

It was a busy day. I couldn't workout yesterday morning because I had to get started super early and finish a big project for one of my clients. After that, I raced off to appointments and didn't finish working and get home until after 7:00pm. I fussed with the kids for a while and then went down to the garage to hang the pegboard that's been sitting on my shelf for three weeks. By the time I was finished and ready to start my workout, it was midnight. Well, better late than never.

The workout was great. Last week was recovery week so I'm back to hitting it hard again or should I say harder. I popped the P90X Disc 3 Shoulders and Arms into my TV and got my butt kicked for an hour. This is a hard workout but I love the way it pumps me up. I feel like the Incredible Hulk when I'm finished.

After the main workout, I had another 15 minutes of Ab Ripper X. This ab workout is getting much easier and my form is improving on all of the exercises. Most importantly, my abs are harder than a brick wall. I still don't have a visible six-pack but that's just because I can't burn this one inch layer of fat off my middle-aged belly. I still have two weeks on the Prednisone my neurologist prescribed. Hopefully, when I'm totally off of this horrible medicine, my weight will start to drop again and I'll get the abs I've been killing myself for.

I am writing this post early in the morning and I only had about four hours of sleep. I am tired. Now it's time to drag my ass downstairs for 90 minutes of Yoga X. Alas, there is no finish line.

Day 58: Keep Pushin' Play

I'm 58 days into P90X with 32 days to go and I am stuck in the Doldrums. Although doldrums means a dull, listless or depressed mood, the term also refers to an area near the equator noted for calm periods when the winds disappear or are very light. The Doldrums were notorious with sailors because this region's periods of deadly calm could trap ships for days or weeks on end as they waited for enough wind to power their sails.

That's how I feel. I'm waiting for some wind to fill my sails and get things moving again. At this point, P90X is nothing but work. The enthusiasm is gone. The motivation is gone. Everything is moving by sheer willpower alone. That's why today's plyometrics workout was just hellish.

How do I keep going if P90X is nothing but a joyless workout at this point? How am I going to survive another 32 days? I just keep pushin' play. That's my new mantra. I heard Tony Horton say it on one of the first DVD's and now I understand exactly what he meant. When you wake up with the demon of excuses sitting on your chest, you just keep pushin' play. When you dread your P90X workouts, you just keep pushin' play. P90X isn't about having fun. If it were, everyone would be doing it. America wouldn't be having an obesity pandemic.

P90X is about sweat, effort, discipline, and commitment. P90X is about going down to my garage gym early every single morning whether I feel like it or not. P90X is about hanging in there when I'm stuck in the Doldrums. The Doldrums may appear calm for long periods of time, but this is also where most hurricanes are formed. All I have to do is keep pushin' play. Sooner or later the winds will pick up, the sails will fill, and I'll have a hurricane on my hands. Keep pushin' play.

Day 57: Girly Pushups

Back in the old days, we called these type of push ups girly push ups. You had to be careful though. If the coach or one of the other boy caught you doing them, your life was over. You would be forever ridiculed and teased . Never again would you be permitted to be part of the boys club. You would be permanently labeled a pussy. For some reason, the fact that I wasn't able to do one regular push up was never a problem.

Well, you can call me a pussy. I've been fighting off some type of virus making today's P90X workout absolute hell. Twice I was dry-heaving into the waste basket. I was weak, achy and tired. I did lots of girly push ups. It's the only way I completed and survived the workout.

I don't know what all the fuss was about. Trust me. Girly push ups are hard. I switch to girly pushup when I can no longer do the regular push ups but want to squeeze out a few more reps. I also do girly push ups because that's the only way I can do some of the push ups like the one-armed or clap push ups. Girly push ups are also great for those of you just starting your physical conditioning. You don't want to be a stud. You want to be smart and work your way up. Don't worry about what the other boys are going to say.

Now, I think I'm going to go be sick.

Day 56: Yoga Hungover

Yeah, I know I swore off alcohol in a previous post. Call me a hypocrite, but I went to a club with Karen last night and the only way this white boy can get on the dance floor is with some liquid courage. Let's just say that by the end of the night I was one courageous dancing fool. I had a blast though. The music was great. The crowd was a blast and I was dancing with the cutest girl in the place. I had no regrets.

When I woke up at 7:30am this morning, I did have regrets. I wasn't totally wrecked, but let's just say that my mind and body didn't feel like they were in the same location. I was feeling schwimmy. Unfortunately, I needed to start my P90X Yoga X workout by 9:00am because I had a busy day scheduled. Why did I drink so much? Why did I mix vodka, tequila and beer?

Karen left shortly before 9:00am to take her daughter to riding lessons and I begrudgingly started to assemble my yoga gear. I knew the yoga was going to be hard but within minutes of starting the workout, I discovered that it was going to be even harder than expected. For the first 45 minutes I was slightly dizzy, sluggish and having esophageal spasms (feels like a mild heart attack). However, I pressed on because I won't let myself miss another workout. I'm going to complete all 90 days of P90X with only one miss and then I'm going to go one extra day to make up for that missed day. Yes, I'm obsessed. So sue my lean, muscular, physically fit ass.

In the photo, I am performing the Crane pose which is also known as the Hangover's-Worst-Nightmare pose. I only held the pose for 15 seconds and used a yoga block under my head maintain balance, but, in hangover-time, that's the equivalent of an hour. Not too shabby considering I didn't throw up.

Is there a moral to this story? I'd say, yes, there is. Fun has a price. If you want to do something, you have to ask yourself how much you are willing to pay. A night of drinking and dancing cost me 90 miserable minutes of yoga. I was willing to pay that price and it cost plenty. However, I wasn't willing to pay the price of skipping another workout. That's just way too expensive for me.

Day 55: Obstacles

I got my P90X workout in today...barely. Actually, I switched tomorrow's Stretching X workout with today's Yoga X. I'll do the yoga tomorrow when I have more time. It may be bending the rules a little, but you won't be able to tell the difference when I finish the P90X in 25 days.

So, my girlfriend, Karen, and I drive to my ex-wife's house at 8:00am to pick up my sons, Trevor (14) and Maxwell (16) to take them to a wrestling tournament. They are supposed to be there by 8:30am. On the way to the tournament, they boys inform me that we are going to Coral Springs High and not Coral Glades High like I swear that they originally told me. I budgeted my time for Coral Glades so we are going to be 15 minutes late now. We arrive at Coral Springs High and I drop off the boys and go to find a parking spot. As I'm parking, my phone rings. It is Trevor informing me that the tournament is at Coral Glades High as I originally swore that they told me. I swear some more. And more.

15 minutes later we arrive at Coral Glades High. I'm worried that we are late, but the tournament does actually get started for another two hours until 11:00am. The tournament is enjoyable but longer than anyone expected. We finish at 5:30pm. I rush the boys home, return to Karen's and start on my honey-do list. When I make promises to do things around my Karen's house, I do them. I want to keep my word and be a good boyfriend.

At 7:00pm, I finish the biggest task on the list. I  needed to fasten 50' of chicken wire to the base of the fencing that surrounds the dogs courtyard or pooping patio as we call it in Indiana. The chicken wire is meant to keep the puppies, Trixie and Diesel, from escaping. The puppies have the combined brain power of a mosquito and wouldn't last very long in the real world or even the make-believe world for that matter.

I go inside and see that I am very tight on time. Karen and I are having dinner and drinks with friends sometime after 9:00pm. I decide to switch the Stretching X and Yoga X workouts which gives me an extra half hour. A few minutes into the Stretching X workout, the puppies find me laying on the floor (see the video).

Some days the hardest part of P90X is just finding the time to do. Some days are full of obstacles like those frickin' little puppies mauling me in the video. Some days have all sorts of unplanned surprises. I've missed one day since I started P90X and I promised I wouldn't let it happen again. Today, I barely kept that promise, but I kept it.

Day 54: The X Trials

The most important part of today's workout wasn't the push ups, the lunges, or the squats. It wasn't even the attitude, effort or determination. The most important part of today's workout was that 'X' made on day 54 of my 90 day workout calendar.

At this point on my P90X adventure, I've mastered the discipline part and am showing up every day. I give 100% every workout and never slack. I'm eating healthy and watching my calories. I'm not drinking or smoking. Basically, I'm doing everything I am supposed to be doing.

When I'm finished with the 90 days, I won't be able to point to individual workouts or exercises that transformed me. I won't be able to say it was this food or that supplement or how often I ate or when I ate or what I ate. In other words, what's going to happen doesn't depend on the details. People come up to me all the time and want to fine tune my efforts with some magical little tip that does nothing more than piss me off. "Jeff, you should be taking Protein Power because it has long chain amino acids that cause reactive binding to your neurosensors and stimulate hypertrophy." Blah, blah, blah.

What's going to cause the change I looking for? At the end of 90 days, I am going to look at that piece of paper in the photo and see 90 X's. All I really did was show up 90 days in a row, push the play button on my DVD player and let the P90X's creator, Tony Horton, kick my buck for 60-90 minutes. When the workout's over, I walk over and scratch another "X" on my workout calendar. Every day is a trial. Every day is a test.

P.S. My pull up bar finally arrived. I hope to have it installed soon. Currently, I am able to do one pull up. Hopefully, after a few months, I'll be able to do two pull ups.

Day 53: Twisted Mister

I love P90X recovery weeks. The workouts are still hard (e.g. 2 Yoga X's), but overall, it's still a light week. This morning, I did the Stretching X workout and it was sweet.

My flexibility is improving more rapidly than I could've ever hoped. Granted, by most people's standards I wouldn't be considered limber at all. However, when you've been trapped inside this stiff body as long as I have, you can tell when things are getting better.

For example, look at the glute stretch I'm doing in the photo. When I started P90X eight weeks ago, I could not clasp my hands around my shin like I'm doing in the photo. I had to grab the back of my thigh instead. That may seem like chump change to you, but I'm discovering that small improvements in flexibility yield large results.

I have practically lived my entire life like the Tin Man after he got caught in the rain. Now that I'm starting to experience the benefits of flexibility, I want to double my efforts and work even harder. Thanks to Tony Horton for developing a wonderful program that puts an emphasis on the priorities of fitness. Seldom do I spend money on something that exceeds my expectation like P90X has.

Day 52: Fighting for Fitness

I hate the Ultimate Fighting Championships (UFC). This mixed martial arts (MMA) competition is nothing but a blood sport. Ah hell, It's not even a sport. It's a spectacle.  Yeah, they've cleaned up their act a little bit by banning lots of moves (groin strikes). How noble of them. However, when I see a couple of bloody guys elbowing each other in the face on TV, I still feel like a Roman watching  gladiators murder each other at the local coliseum. I'm sorry, but I don't find that very entertaining.

With that said, my favorite sport to practice is MMA. I love learning how to fight. I love fighting for fitness. The workouts I get boxing and kicking and kneeing and elbowing are the greatest. It's fantastic for cardio and gives me a great plyometrics style workout on my upper body. Oh how I love they achy way I feel after I've been punching the bags for an hour.

Do I practice MMA for self-defense? No way. At 6'5" and 250+ pounds no one ever blows me sh*t. If they would blow me sh*t, they'd probably my size, younger, stronger, drunker and I sure as hell wouldn't want to fight them. Furthermore, fighting sucks. When I took Muay Thai kickboxing classes, the first thing I realized is that I never want to get in a fight. Someone's going to get hurt (probably me) and someone's going to get arrested (probably me). So, MMA will always just be a sport for me. At the most, I might do some light sparring but I'll be wearing protective head gear and pads. For now though, I'll stick to the the bags and change the channel whenever it's on TV.

Day 51: Here Comes the Sun!

My workouts are so bright, I have to wear sunglasses. In other words, my son bought that big black shiny truck I'm standing in front of, so I don't have to drive him to (8:30am) and from (7:00pm) work. Now, after five long weeks, I can start working out in the mornings again! Can I get a hallelujah?!!!

This is absolutely wonderful. I don't enjoy my workouts so I want to knock 'em out early in the morning and get 'em over with. When I work out in the evenings, I spend all day dreading the workout or worrying that something will come up and cause me to miss it (I've only missed one day so far).

Now, when I come home in the evening or should I say, when I come home earlier in the evening, I can do whatever the frack I want. I don't have to spend it exercising. Believe me, I'd prefer spending the time with my boys or my girlfriend or doing one of the many home projects I have on my to do list.

Today's workout was Core Synergistics. It's a tough one. Just when I think I'm in fantastic shape, I do a workout like Core Syn and feel worthless. Heck, my sternum even hurt during some of the routines (they sawed it open back in April during my triple bypass). I haven't felt sternum pain in over a month. I thought I was past all that crap.

Well, I'm off to tackle the day. I've already done the hardest thing I'll have to do today, so everything else is going to be real easy. Oh, the day is looking so, so bright!

Day 50: Put the Pedal to the Metal

I'm starting week 8 of P90X and it is time to put the pedal to the metal and get serious. I've only got six weeks left so I have to make 'em count. From now on, I'm pushing myself and giving 100% during every routine, every workout, every day. I am going to push myself to the limit. My diet is going to be impeccable. No alcohol. No sugar. Low carbs. No cheat meals. My attitude is going to be perfect. Enthusiasm. Optimism. Drive. Determination. Confidence.

The first seven weeks of P90X have gone much better than I expected. I feel unbelievable and am in the best shape of my life. However, I'm not satisfied with the the changes in my physique. When I look at the boxing video I posted two days ago, I see a fat saggy old man. I know I'm carrying a lot of water weight from the frickini' Prednisone, but I weighed in at 258 this morning and that just sucks and that's just inexcusable. I gotta lose some weight; I gotta lean up; I gotta get cut up and ripped.

Now I'm going to find out what I'm really made of. I know I'm capable. I know I can do it. It's time to dig deep. It is time to show some real guts and crush that loser mentality. No excuses. Only results. Bring it.

Note: My son, Ryan, was finally able to get a new vehicle—can you say, hallelujah?—so I'm back to morning workouts starting tomorrow. Trust me. This is going to make life easier for the both of us. I had a very long day, so I didn't finish my Yoga X workout until 11:30pm. The workout was wonderful. I opened the garage door, turned the fans on low, and flipped off the lights so the only illumination came from my TV. Then I did what I said I was going to do and pushed myself 100% for 90 minutes.

Day 49: First Contact

Boy, did I get a surprise today. I actually touched my toes towards the end of my Stretching X workout. During the P90X assessment, 49 long days ago, I was 14" away from those 10 little piggies and today I touched them. Granted, I was huffing and puffing just like that Big Bad Wolf.


Although I have a vivid memory of biting my toenails when I was 3-4 years old, I have no other memories of being flexible. I've been a stiffy as long as I can remember. I'm sure part of my inflexibility is genetic, but to be honest, I have never put any effort into it. Stretching was always a pain in the ass, so I avoided it.

Nowadays, I do an easy stretch before and after each day's P90X workout. I also do at least one Stretching X and one Yoga X workout each week. On recovery weeks, like the one starting tomorrow, I do two Stretching X's and two Yoga X's. I figure I've spent over 20 hours stretching during the last seven weeks. That's why I'm I'm finally seeing some serious progress.

After today's success, I am motivated to push myself even harder as I continue to work to increase my flexibility. Tomorrow starts my second recovery week so I'm going to be doing four days of flexibility workouts and believe me, I am going to put renewed effort into it.

Day 48: Boom Boom Pow

I like that boom boom pow
Them chickens jackin' my style
They try copy my swagger
I'm on that next shit now

I'm so 3008
You so 2000 and late
I got that boom, boom, boom
That future boom, boom, boom
Let me get it now

Oh, baby! Tonight I had that boom boom pow during my Kenpo X workout. I was on fire. I felt so good walking upstairs after the workout that I started to feel guilty and asked myself if I'd pushed myself hard enough. The answer was, yes. I kicked butt during every routine until I was wiped out. However, I am getting into such good shape, my recoveries are almost immediate. Try punching for 90 seconds straight like I'm doing in the video. That is one exhausting routine but I felt like new again within 30 seconds. I got that boom boom pow, baby!

Earlier today, I finally flipped my rubber flooring over and put three strips of heavy duty duct tape over the seams. On a 8'x16' floor consisting of 2'x2' interlocking tiles, that required over 300' of tape. In other words, that sucker is solid. After taping the floor and flipping it right side up, I did my Kenpo X workout and didn't see any splitting on the tiles. That makes an anal retentive man like me very happy.

Tomorrow's Stretching X working concludes my seventh week of P90X. Next week is recovery week so I get to change things up a little with two Stretching X's, two Yoga X's, two Core Synergistics, and a Kenpo X. It's gonna be fun.

Day 47: Shake a Leg

I did a late afternoon P90X leg and back workout and I hit it hard. This workout has lots of squats and lunges and they make my legs burn with that muscle-growing pain. In this photo I am shaking a leg and trying to get rid of that precious burn. It's easy to switch to autopilot on these workouts after you've done them over and over and forget to push yourself. Therefore, I try to stay focused and give it my all. The burn is just a indicator that I'm doing what I need to be doing and not wasting time.

As I get more and more days of P90X under my belt, the workouts are becoming more mental and less physical. As Tony Horton constantly reminds me on the P90X DVD's, you have to get your mind right. Now that I've passed the halfway mark, I need to hit the gas a little harder. I really need to push myself even harder if I am going to get the results I want. As I've said in past posts, I feel significantly healthier but any physical changes have been relatively modest.

It's time for me to shake a leg.

Day 46: Upward Dog

I started off the second half of this adventure with some Yoga X. It was hard but I had the fans on and garage door open. Pretty much all of the yoga experts I consulted told me I was better off doing my yoga with ventilation. The hot yoga I was doing only assists with flexibility. I still find the yoga to be difficult and at 90 minutes it just seems to last forever. However, I'm not suffering like I did in the beginning.

I'm doing the upward dog pose in the photo. My feet are supposed to be pointed but when I move them into that position my neuropathy/neuralgia goes haywire. It feels like someone is shocking my feet with electrodes and it hurts like bloody Hell.

I visited my neurologist today and he says the tests are all coming back negative so they can't determine why my body has triggered this auto-immune response and is destroying the nerves in my feet and hands. The disease is what they call idiopathic, a fancy name for we don't know. However, the progression of the disease appears to have slowed and the pain medication shaves off most of the pain most of the time. Fortunately, the pain medication is not an opioid so it doesn't get me high.

At this point, the doctor is going to ween me off of the Prednisone, which is not working, over the next four weeks and see what happens. I have to come off the Prednisone slowly so my adrenal system doesn't crash. I am very glad to be getting off the Prednisone because it makes me retain water and is affecting my moods. I have been quite a prick lately.

Rather than getting depressed over this whole affair, I am looking at the bright side and that's quite easy to do. The pain is manageable with the medication they are giving me. I just have infrequent bolts of pains instead of constant pain. The medication is easily affordable with my insurance. The disease is not progressing so I most likely won't end up losing motor skills and I do love my motor skills. Also, I've survived open heart surgery when most people with a blocked ventricle would have died. I totaled my car twice and walked away uninjured both times. I have tons of great friends, three wonderful sons, and I met the woman of my dreams this year. Yes, we are very much in love. I guess to quote Dickinson, it's been the best of times and it's been the worst of times.

I have absolutely nothing to complain about. This old dog is looking upward.

Day 45: Halfway Home

Wow! I'm 45 days into P90X already. I can't believe how fast it's gone and I can't believe how long it's taken. I love it and I hate it. It's killing me and it's keeping me alive.

Six months ago, when I came home after my triple bypass, I remember laying in bed one night. I had just hobbled up the stairs so I was having the scary breathing and wondering if I'd wake up the next morning. I was weak as a baby, a very sick baby. I was depressed, on pain killers, afraid to cough or sneeze, and wondering if I was going to be a gimp for the rest of my life.

Man oh man, how quickly things change. I honestly have never felt better in my entire life. After 45 days I do see some physical changes but nothing like what I feel changing on the inside. I feel young again. I feel athletic again. I have energy again. I have stamina again. In fact, my girlfriend, Karen, often begs me to quit telling her how good I feel or as she says, "enough already!" Then she smiles and kisses me.

This P90X is doing it all for me. I'm getting proper nutrition. I'm working all the muscle groups. I'm increasing my flexibility. I'm building those fast twitch muscle and getting my spring and ability to jump back. I'm improving my cardiovascular health so I can keep going and going and going. I am turning back the clock and aging in reverse just like Benjamin Buttons. All I have had to do is show up and keep pushing play on my DVD.

I'll spare you anymore of my manic musings. I'm happy and grateful and could prattle all night long. However, it's getting late and I need to get up early. I gotta knock out these next 45 days of P90X.

Thanks for listening.

Day 44: The Garage Mahal (Almost)

I took the day off and worked on my garage. I purchased and installed 16 feet of steel shelving 5' tall and 18" deep. This gives me more than enough room to store everything and have enough space for all of my exercise equipment. Now that I can put my weights on the shelves, I have much more floor space available also. It really looks nice and only cost me about $450.

I only have a few more things to do before my garage is finished. This weekend, I'm flipping the rubber flooring and applying heavy-duty duct tape to the seams and then flipping it back over so the tape is on the bottom. This should prevent the floor tiles from pulling apart (bugs the Hell out of me). I'm also mounting plastic peg board on the wall so I can hang all my bands, clipboards, and some small tools. Finally, I am waiting for a 4' pull up bar to arrive (sigh, back ordered) and install on the ceiling. When I'm all finished I'll make a video and give you the grand tour. I really enjoy my home gym and am even thinking of dropping my LA Fitness membership since I seldom go.

Tonight's workout was plyometrics. Now that I am wearing tennis shoes and working out on the rubber flooring, I no longer am experiencing any knee pain, thank God. Plyo is still the hardest workout but it is really helping me get back into shape so I can jump again. I actually think I may be able to play basketball soon and hit those boards for some serious rebounds.

Day 43: I Hate Working Out

Pant! Gasp! Groan! Moan! OMG, when is this going to end? P90X ain't getting any easier, folks. I'm getting stronger and my conditioning is through the roof, but these workouts are still kicking my butt. Today begins week 7 of this 13 week ordeal.

My father's been visiting from Indiana and commented that I must really enjoy working out to have hung in there so long. I responded that I don't enjoy working out but rather, I enjoy having worked out. Today's shoulder, back, tricep and ab workout lasted 75 horrible minutes. I enjoyed the 76th minute. I enjoyed walking up the stairs to get a glass of ice tea knowing that I'd put another workout in the bank. I enjoyed knowing that I had made it another day and had not given into some lame excuse to skip my workout.

My girlfriend, Karen, summed it up even better when she told me last night that the only thing she hates more than working out is not working out. That's why she drags her ass to the gym five days a week. That's why this 40-something 5' tall little girl can do more push ups than I'll ever be able to do. That's why Karen looks oh so fine.

Day 42: Sunday Stretch

Imagine walking into your kitchen and seeing something like this. Although it looks like a picture of a corpse with severe rigor mortis, it is merely me doing a shoulder stand in my girlfriend, Karen's, living room (view from the kitchen). In fact, it is quite the opposite of rigor mortis these days, because I am finally becoming much more flexible.

I'm haven't become a Gumby yet, but I am noticing quite significant changes in the way my body can move now. I am able to squat and bend more easily and without any pain. My father and I assembled the bunk beds from Hell this week and I had to move my body around into all kinds of angles and positions. Except for the fact that I am a large ogre and require lots of space, I had not trouble bending myself into various contortions during the 4-hour assembly process.

Stretching used to be a pain and something I always neglected. Now that I am stretching almost daily and experiencing the benefits first hand in my life, I now look forward to my stretching workouts. In fact, stretching and yoga have become my two most important workouts. I have a long way to go but I have also come a long way. Seven weeks ago, if I'd tried a shoulder stand, my girlfriend, Karen, would have been calling 911 instead of taking this photo.